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Happy Relationships Matter, Issue #59 -- It's Here! No more Waiting!
December 21, 2013
Welcome To The Latest Issue Of Relationships Matter!
Welcome to the Holiday issue of Happy Relationships Matter! In this issue, you will read about some very powerful tips for improving your life and for enjoying the season.
Those who have "Seasonal Affective Disorder" are surely grieving the loss of the long, warm days of fall, and all the wonderful sunshine. It's raining here in central Kentucky. And it's so dreary!
But, you can turn a cloudy and depressing day into a wonderful day by doing a little reframing. In this issue you'll find tips on how to reframe any situation. Thank you for reading our electronic newsletter.
If you are in need of counseling and therapy, and you live in central Kentucky, please go to my website to learn more about my services. You may also sign up for Life Coaching services, if you prefer.
Our office is located in the Hamburg area of Lexington, Kentucky, and is very easy to get to. It is located near I-75 and I-64, and is close to all parts of the city.
We are accepting only a very few new clients for individual, couple or family sessions, and it takes two to three weeks to get on the schedule. We accept most types of insurance along with credit cards. You may want to call Ginny to inquire about available appointments. The office number is 859-264-1175. Here is this month's feature article . . .
How to Reframe Any Situation For The Better
1. Okay, is it cold and dreary outside? You could get depressed about it, and tell yourself it's going to be an awful day. Or you could reframe as follows:
"Wow, sure looks dismal out there, but that's okay. I'm going to get a lot accomplished today, and it's a good day to go and take a refreshing walk with the dog, which will wake me up and inspire me to be more productive."
See how reframing the original expectation makes you look forward to the day? Instead of being depressed, you can feel good!
2. Another example, you have a new neighbor moving in, and everyone says the neighbor is weird or hard to deal with. So, you let yourself get negative and you expect to encounter problems with the neighbor.
Or you can see the positive side by thinking this way: "They say the new neighbor is a problem, but I'm going to give him a chance and try to welcome him to the neighborhood and really try and get to know him before I judge."
The reframe allows you to feel good about the neighbor, and you won't worry about it or dread meeting him.
3. The holidays are dreadful and tiring and I can't wait till it's all over!
Okay, the above attributional style will cause you to feel disgusted and depressed. But let's look at another way to frame it all up: "Yes, the holidays can be trying and tiring, but I'm keeping my head up this year, and I'm going to prioritize my time wisely so I can enjoy doing the things that are most important and enjoyable, and I won't do too much."
Now you feel better, right? Just changing the way you look at a situation can transform the situation into a positive and hopeful one.
In sum, remember to reframe problems into potential solutions by applying creative, optimisitc logic to the situation at hand.
Are You Lonely?
Many people feel lonely at this time of year. There's so much to be done and so little time, and seeing people at parties isn't always very gratifying. But those who suffer from Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) may feel more lonely than most.
My clients with ADHD often tell me they feel lonely, and they don't have many friends. They may have trouble finding new friends or connecting with people. They feel no one understands them or knows how they feel.
Another problem for ADHDers is they are notoriously hard to live with . . . and they have poor social skills. When you have trouble listening to others or paying attention to their needs, or you fail to take time to nourish your relationships, you will tend to be lonely. Let's face it.
What can you do about it?
One, call a friend or colleague up and offer to go out for coffee. Buy them a drink and try your very best to do a good job of listening to your friend and just enjoy hanging out with him/her. Keep the focus on your firend.
Two, make a concerted effort to give more time and attention to your relationships, in general. Nurture your friendships. Cultivate meaningful relationships. Make it easier for people to be around you. Improve your appraoch so more people want to spend time wtih you.
Three, brush up on your pro-social skills. Learn HOW to form friendships.
You can get good tips on how to make friends at the world's greatest ADHD magazine, ADDitudeMag.com.
In summary, focus on being a better friend, colleague and loved one by putting a priority on your relationships. Go out and start changing your relationships right now! You will be less lonely and more involved with others in a short time. See You Next Time
Ignoring Your Family? Make Time For Family Fun!
Families should love the holidays, but sadly the holidays can be a time for disappointment or despair. Kids may not remember the expensive gifts they find under the tree, but they will remember time spent playing with the people they love.
How To Have Family Fun:
1. Play old-fashioned board games. Kids and adults love it!
2. Cook special holiday meals together. Kids love it!
3. Play catch in the backyard. Make snow angels. Go sleigh riding!
4. Read picture books toegether. Even adults love 'em!
5. Make ornaments toegether or decorate cookies. Who doesn't enjoy such time-honored traditions.
Whatever you do, spend more time with the people you love and you'll make more memories . . .
and the whole family will love the holidays even more.
So Long Untile Next Time
Well, that's it for now, folks. Stay tuned for the next issue!
Check out our exciting new developments and services. Have a great holiday season, and thanks for reading my relationship eZine! Let me know how I can help you with your relationships or other concerns.
Richard E. Hamon, LMFT Licensed Therapist Certified Coach Board Certified Supervisor
P.S. It's been a pleasure having you as a newsletter reader. Please let me know if you have any ideas or suggestions for future issues!!! Or if you need help with anything.
Ezine ArticlesIn addition to writing articles for Happy Relationships.com, I write articles for EzineArticles.com, and they get the articles published on the internet. In the past few years, I have written over 100 articles on all kinds of mental health and self-improvement topics, such as depression and anxiety, loneliness, leadership and management, happiness, relationships, near death experiences, meditation, hypnosis, parenting strong, resilient kids, and interpreting your dreams, etc.
If you'd like to see some of my articles, feel free to run over to Ezinearticles.com, and look up my author's page.
Get the links below . . .
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