Spice Up Relationships

Spice up relationships and great sex will follow with an established, trusting relationship. There are no shortcuts. But there are many exciting ways to build a great love life. It begins with respect and love, and lots of giving.

Great Sex Begins with a Relationship, Not a Technique

A solid relationship - one built on mutual trust, understanding and respect, as well as, equality. The partners need to be best of friends. And they need to be great communicators.

What does communication have to do with it? Everything! Great sex requires great communication skills. Lovemaking skills are secondary. Without close and effective communication and feedback, anyone's sex life will suffer. So spice up relationships by communicating

Spouses who have a great love life know themselves and each other well! They have slowly and painstakingly built a relationship. And a relationship needs time - time to develop and flourish - before blissful encounters can happen on a regular basis.

Many people in our culture want everything now, including sexual bliss. But if impatient and demanding, what they'll get is the equivalent of fast food. To spice up a relationship takes plenty of time, an investment in sustained effort and diligent attention.

Focus on the Journey

It's the journey that counts, not just the destination. If we stop focusing on the end result, and throw our energies into the journey, the bliss will come.

Investing in a wonderful friendship is far more important than mastering sexual techniques. Yet people seldom think of working at improving their friendship. We live in a world today where people are challenged to support one another in adequate ways. It is often difficult to keep the connection strong between lovers, and to block the distractions that threaten to undermine the relationship. There seems to be little time for good communication and, when we hurry, misunderstandings occur all too frequently.

Finding a way to keep the friendship strong, and the feeling of intimacy vibrant and real, may be the biggest challenge of couples today. If you’re friendship is lukewarm, then you should look at ways to deepen it. Go back to the basics. Work on your relationship or your intimate life will continue to suffer, too.

If your good feelings about the relationship are in the past, and not the present, the two of you may need to work on relating to each other better in the here‑and‑now. If you are hoping for a better relationship in the future, but not getting your needs met in the present, you should work on the reality of your relationship in this moment.

If your sex life is a disappointment, assess your relationship. Chances are there are problems. As soon as you begin working toward resolution, both of you will feel better, allowing your intimate life to get better on its own.

Spice Up Relationships - Communicate

Communication is often lacking in today's marriages. Spouses simply have less time for talking, and everything is done at a whirlwind pace. Frustration and fatigue, demanding schedules and material demands chip away at the couple's relationship.

You may be talking at but not to each other. You may not be listening, which is more than hearing with one ear while you are thinking about something else. Listening is not just nodding and agreeing. Sometimes spouses avoid dealing with conflict because they don't feel up to it and don't have the energy after a long day. You may be avoiding your spouse, hiding in the mists of secrecy and silence, which has a corrosive influence on the marriage.

What to do? Start talking. Keep those communication channels open. Realize that open and caring communication is everyday maintenance. It is a sign of commitment. When you feel least like talking, but you need to talk, do it! Once you've talked things out and said what needs to be said, your sex life will sizzle.


Go to Advice on Relationships from Spice Up Relationships