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Happy Relationships Matter, Issue #61 -- It's Here! No more Waiting!
June 27, 2014
Welcome To The Latest Issue Of Relationships Matter!
Summer Is Here
Welcome to the revised and complete June issue of Happy Relationships Matter! In this issue, you will read about some very powerful tips for improving your life and enjoying the summer.
Get tips on: -- how to save a relationship -- how to fan the flames of romance -- learning the secrets to a successful marriage -- overcome loneliness
In the last issue, we talked about how you can reform a cloudy and depressing day by turning it into a wonderful, upbeat day through the use of reframing. In this issue you'll find additional powerful tips on how to find the silver lining in the clouds of your relationships.
And I'll introduce my new e-Book, Relationship Gold, and show you how you can pick up your very own copy.
Thank you so much for reading our electronic newsletter.
If you are in need of counseling and therapy, and you live in central Kentucky, please go to my website to learn more about my services. You may also sign up for Life Coaching services, if you prefer.
Our office is located in the Hamburg area of Lexington, Kentucky, and is very easy to get to. It is located near I-75 and I-64, and is close to all parts of the city.
We are accepting only a very few new clients for individual, couple or family sessions, and it takes three to four weeks to get on the schedule. We accept most types of insurance along with credit cards. The office number is 859-264-1175. Here is this month's feature article . . .
How to Save a Broken Relationship
Research on thousands of couples shows how not to save a relationship. Here are five of the biggest ways to fail at saving your marriage:
1. Raise problems angrily 2. Bring up concerns later, not sooner 3. Get intensely upset when you disagree with your spouse 4. Escalate the most minor arguments 5. Refuse to change your behavior when your spouse requests it
Couples seeking to save their marriage fail when they resort to the above behaviors. When they fight, they don't know when to stop or how to control their emotions. When the fight is over, they take too long to make up.
So, what can you do to save your relationship? Simply follow the lead of the successful couples that were studied. They had a different skill set.
How To Save Your Relationship
1. Rather than trying to win the argument, try to better understand your partner's point of view; walk a mile in his/her shoes.
2. Bring up issues calmly and in a non-demanding way
3. Agree to disagree in a civil fashion
4. Work it out so both spouses can save face and feel as though they're winning
5. Make at least five positive remarks for every one negative remark
6. Focus on the present specific concern or complaint, and not the past, or past mistakes and failures
7. Use a sense of humor, be reassuring
8. If you get too emotional, end the argument and finish later
9. Make up quickly
10. Avoid placing blame -- ask what you can do to improve the relationship. Be responsible for your own mistakes and limitations.
These are just some of the skills successful couples use to solve relationship problems and find success in marriage. Why not take a tip or two from them?
Even some of the happiest couples have gone through hard, seemingly impossible times, but they triumphed in the end. And you can too, if you take the right steps.
Are You Lonely?
Please note: This article is being reprinted from a previous issue, by request.
Many people feel lonely today. But those who suffer from Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) may feel more lonely than most.
My clients with ADHD often tell me they feel lonely, and they don't have many friends. They may have trouble finding new friends or connecting with people. They feel no one understands them or knows how they feel.
Another problem for ADHDers is they are notoriously hard to live with . . . and they have poor social skills. When you have trouble listening to others or paying attention to their needs, or you fail to take time to nourish your relationships, you will tend to be lonely. Let's face it.
What can you do about it?
One, call a friend or colleague up and offer to go out for coffee. Buy them a drink and try your very best to do a good job of listening to your friend and just enjoy hanging out with him/her. Keep the focus on your friend.
Two, make a concerted effort to give more time and attention to your relationships, in general. Nurture your friendships. Cultivate meaningful relationships. Make it easier for people to be around you. Improve your approach so more people want to spend time with you.
Three, brush up on your pro-social skills. Learn HOW to form friendships.
You can get good tips on how to make friends at the world's greatest ADHD magazine, ADDitudeMag.com.
In summary, focus on being a better friend, colleague and loved one by putting a priority on your relationships. Go out and start changing your relationships right now! You will be less lonely and more involved with others in a short time.
Ignoring Your Partner or Spouse? Haven't had sex in ages? This brief article reveals a few simple but effective tips for revamping your love life. Make Time For more fun with your beloved now!
Couples should not put their relationship on the back burner of the stove, but keep it on the front. Once you let your relationship go, it can be hard to get it back.
Try the following tips for improving your romantic life.
How To Restore Romance:
1. Play more often -- go to the park and swing, play miniature golf, do things you used to do when you were dating
2. Cook together and try new dishes
3. Take steps to become best buds again -- friendship leads to romance
4. Read picture books together and be kids again . . .
5. Set aside a weekly date night, just like you did when you were in the courting phase. Take turns being in charge of the date
6. Plan surprises for your spouse
7. Try new experiments or positions in the lovemaking realm
8. There isn't always time for a full course dinner, so learn to make quickies do sometimes
9. Treat your partner like a king or queen or an honorable guest
10. Be responsive -- when your partner makes a bid for affection, grant his/herwish
Whatever you do, spend more time with the one you love and you'll make more memories, grow closer together and your friendship will fuel the flames of romance.
Don't deny yourselves any longer. If mom and dad are happier and more satisfied, even the kids will benefit in the end.
So Long Until Next Time
Well, that's it for now, folks. Stay tuned for the next issue!
Check out our exciting new developments and services. This eZine will start coming out on a weekly basis, and it will offer you savings and bonuses, so don't miss out. Have a great summer, and thanks for reading my relationship eZine! Let me know how I can help you with your relationships or other concerns.
Richard E. Hamon, LMFT Licensed Therapist Certified Coach Board Certified Supervisor
P.S. It's been a pleasure having you as a newsletter reader. Please let me know if you have any ideas or suggestions for future issues!!! Or if you need help with anything.
Ezine ArticlesIn addition to writing articles for Happy Relationships.com, I write articles for EzineArticles.com, and they get the articles published on the internet. In the past few years, I have written over 100 articles on all kinds of mental health and self-improvement topics, such as depression and anxiety, loneliness, leadership and management, happiness, relationships, near death experiences, meditation, hypnosis, parenting strong, resilient kids, and interpreting your dreams, etc.
If you'd like to see some of my articles, feel free to run over to Ezinearticles.com, and look up my author's page.
Get the links below . . .
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