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Got Relationship Problems? Pro Save Your Relationship Tips here.
June 28, 2016
Welcome To The Latest Issue Of Relationships Matter!
HELLO from Richard Hamon, LMFT . . . here’s the guidance you need to TRANSFORM your problems into opportunities to achieve relationship success. Increase your happiness and joy now.
Pro Relationship Tips: How to Save Your Relationship
Relationships are under siege these days. We have little time, we work too much, and we have so many distractions, it's hard to focus on them. If you have a failing marriage or other type of relationship issue, and you want to save your relationship, here are some tips for you.
1. Avoid talking about the same old problems in the same way, resulting in gridlock and frustration. You'll have to learn new ways of resolving conflict. Try limiting your discussions to once or twice per week. Set rules and boundaries for discussion, such as no outbursts or disrespectful language.
2. Stop expressing CONTEMPT to your partner -- don't put them down or treat them with disdain, and don't call them names
3. Avoid throwing criticism at your partner; refrain from critical and castigating remarks, even if you're angry or you feel justified
4. Avoid keeping score or trying to get even with them
5. Don't blame them for the problems -- projecting blame will get you nowhere
6. Do not "stonewall" or avoid responding to your partner. You aren't a block of stone and a stone has no heart. So respond to you partner, even if you feel disappointed in him/her. Keep communication lines open.
7. Listen without being defensive. Why make excuses, defend yourself or change the subject when your friend expresses a concern or asks you to do something? You'll go nowhere. Just listen. No arguments or "come-backs." Listen to understand and show that you hear what your partner is saying.
8. Stop trying to control your partner or legislate their responses, ideas and beliefs. Accept your differences. Let your partner be who they are.
9. Start spending more time together, renewing your friendship, and having more FUN. Smell the roses together. Hold hands and take a stroll. Recapture some of that old dating magic you had at the beginning of your relationship.
10. Avoid wasting your time trying to discuss or resolve old, stubborn differences. In other words, accept the un-resolvable nature of some disagreements...and move on! Why argue forever about the same old things?
The above tips may help you to reprogram your relationship, while sending a powerful message to the brain that you are embarking upon a path of healing and change.
When something goes wrong, stay relaxed and discuss it. Communicate. Don't blame. Don't insult him/her! CALMLY talk about possible solutions. Yes, focus on the solutions. Have confidence that you can get through the dark times together. If you disagree, do so in a friendly way. It ain't the end of the world.
MEDICATION FOR YOUR RELATIONSHIP
Wouldn't it be nice if we could fix our problems by taking a pill? I'd love to wave my Magic Wand and permanently solve my clients' problems, but either my wand has lost its power or it's on strike, because that rarely seems to work anymore.
But, if one of you has a mental health disorder, you may need to go on a course of medication to help control that problem . . . which will in turn help the relationship.
Work to Stay Positive
Research shows that you can improve almost any relationship problem by taking a more positive and upbeat tone with your partner, engaging in more enjoyable activities, and letting go of the constant bickering and arguing that afflicts most struggling relationships.
To save a marriage that's on the rocks, you may have to suspend all serious discussions until such a time as you can get some help, i.e. professional counseling. In the meantime, try no avoid adding fuel to the fire or stirring things up.
Why let your relationship problems keep you down? Do something positive right now to save your all-important relationship today.
Start showing plenty of respect, express your admiration and affection, engage in calm and considerate discussions, and avoid the negativity trap (criticism, contempt, blaming). Try listening deeply and patiently, and really hear your partner's perspective.
Give it time to solve all your problems. Take the first step toward change today. Soon, you'll discover what it feels like to be happy and free again. Good luck!
Let me know if you have questions or need further help.
I have written many articles on how to solve mental health and relational problems. They are stored on my website for your quick and easy access. Feel free to contact me if you need help.
You'll find two of my eBooks on the website, too, which go into some detail and offer clinical insights and pointers that can help you navigate life's shark-infested waters.
Go to: www.happy-relationships.com and check them out:
1. "Relationship Gold"
2. "The Ultimate Relationship Solution"
A third eBook is on its way and will be available in a week or two. "The Secret to Happiness"
Relationship Gold is my most popular book (some people use it as a guide or resource, with or without therapy) and will assist you in . . .
Finding Help for These Problems:
1. You and your partner can't stop fighting
2. You’re about to give up on your relationship or marriage
3. You have lost an important relationship and don’t know how to get it back
4. You want to make your good romantic relationship bullet-proof, affair-proof and cutting edge
5. You want to enjoy all the benefits your relationships can give you, but feel your relationships are not reaching their potential
6. You’re stuck in a relationship rut, you’ve lost your passion and you want to re-invigorate your relationship
7. Your romantic life has hit rock-bottom, or has been slipping, and you want to re-ignite your sex life and make it sizzle again
8. You’re still holding on to your relationship, but you and your partner have grown distant from each other, and you want to be best friends again and communicate better
9. You let your relationship go, while you attended to other things, but time has gone by and now you can’t seem to get your relationship back on track
10. You want to take your relationships more seriously, and get more out of them, but you aren’t sure how to go about it
If you’d like more information on Relationship Gold, go to my website (www.happy-relationships.com) and click on the Relationship Gold button under OUR E-PRODUCTS.
Thanks for reading The Hamon Group, LLC newsletter everyone, and have a great day. I’ll see you again soon.
Richard E. Hamon, LMFT Licensed Therapist & Certified Coach
P.S. It's been a pleasure having you as a newsletter reader. Let me know if you have any ideas or suggestions for future issues!!! Or if you need help with anything at all.
Ezine ArticlesMore of My Writings
In addition to writing articles for Happy Relationships.com, I write articles for EzineArticles.com, and they have the articles published with magazines and newsletters on the internet. In the past few years, I have written over 100 articles on all kinds of mental health and self-improvement topics, such as depression and anxiety, loneliness, leadership and management, happiness, relationships, Near Death Experiences, meditation, hypnosis, parenting strong, resilient kids, and interpreting your dreams, etc.
If you'd like to see some of my MOST POPULAR articles, or my NEWEST articles, feel free to run over to Ezinearticles.com, and look up my author's page.
Get the links below . . .
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