The Power of Now:
Use the Precious Present to Change Your Life 

You can use the power of now to make changes in your life or to capture more happiness. Tired of trying to make changes that don't work? Tired of planning, but never actualizing the plan? 

It's not helpful to say, Some day I'll make my dreams come true. It's no good to say, well, I'll start my new diet tomorrow. Or I'll start losing weight next week, after a weekend of emotional eating and binge eating. We must act now to make a change happen.

Anyone can tap into the power of now to get a new goal or project rolling. You can stop procrastinating or stop creating doubt by acting in the present, by tapping into the moment at hand. So, the question becomes, what can I do right now to get the ball rolling toward my goals?

There is no power in putting something off. No power in just dreaming or imagining a different future, if you don't DO something different. So, let's use the power of now to make something happen, right now.

A couple sitting on the grass talking and having funMake something good happen in your relationships right now. Be together and have fun. Show you care.

How to Use the Power of Now

Instead of making dreamy, starry-eyed plans that you will not follow through on, why not start making your dream come true right now by taking a specific, concrete step? Back to the weight loss scenario . . . I can drink a glass of water, rather than a sweet tea or soft drink -- now. I can get up and move, take a walk or pump a little iron, right now.

And by taking the initiative to act in the present moment, I can increase my chances of success by far, since I'll be more likely to follow through later if I act now. Let's say you want to be a rock drummer someday, but you don't have a drum kit. No problem.

You can buy a little drum pad for a few bucks, take it with you everywhere you go. You could watch an instructional video online right now and start drumming. Even if you don't have a drum pad and sticks, you could practice on a table top with pencils.

"I have one aim only: to impart the meaning of the word now."
Fritz Perls

Rather than feeling anxious about never making your dream come true or feeling sorry for yourself because you don't have a drum set, you can get started on your dream by using the power of now to do something that takes you a bit closer to your goal.

If you start to work on your goal using the power of now, the anxiety will go away because your inner mind sees that you are going after your goal. As soon as you've taken a lesson, improvised a kit or spent an hour watching drumming videos, you'll feel so much better.

How to Lose Weight NOW 

Let's return to our discussion of weight loss. Trying to lose weight, but you are stuck at your desk all day? You can take your coffee without cream or sugar. That's a good beginning. A single small step can begin a long or even lifelong journey. Tap into the power of now and harness the hidden energy in the precious present.

Instead of eating, you can drink an extra glass of water so you won't feel hungry. That's a reasonable action you can take to get started on your weight loss program right this minute. After all, your unconscious knows if you really want to do something, because you'll get serious and just do it. If you do it now, you'll make a believer of yourself, and you'll be all in.

But, if you put it off, or make a list you'll never adhere to, why waste your time? 

The message we send the inner self is often so confusing. We tell ourselves we want to do something, but we do something else. Or we don't do anything at all, but talk. That becomes a confusing game, which only creates self-doubt and uncertainty. 

In contrast, by acting in the present moment, by employing the power of now, we make it clear we're serious and we're going to get something done -- we're going to get what we want, starting now! Do something now. It's a real beginning, and it can lead to greater things. Just get the ball rolling. 

The Wisdom of Gestalt Therapy

According to the father of Gestalt Therapy, Fritz Perls, you have to be fully alive in the present to make a change,  invested in the power of the here-and-now, or you will just be spitting in the wind. After all, all we have is the here-and-now. The past has already happened and the future hasn't come yet. The only real power we have is in the precious NOW.

Young couple sitting on a bench singing and laughingYou don't have to sing or recite poetry to enjoy your friendship more, just sit close together on a bench and have a little fun.

Want to Improve the Quality of Your Marriage?

Let's say you want to improve your marriage . . . the time to act is now. Think and act. In truth, I can act to improve my relationship with or without my partner's cooperation. I can sit here and think of a host of reasons I can't fix my relationship, or I can get busy and use the power of now to make something good happen. 

You can act  now and seek your partner's cooperation later. If he/she sees you working hard to improve yourself, they will be more likely to do the same. One good turn leads to another.

You can Start Right Now

Visualize the relationship you both want, and see yourself stepping up to do something to make it happen. Or you ask yourself what you need to change to become a better partner. For instance, you could focus on your partner's needs more. You could ask for your partner's feedback and ask how they want you to change. What could you do to make your partner feel more loved, more respected, more valued?

Harness the Power of the Here-and-Now

You could focus less on your partner's limitations, and more on his/her strengths, changing your perception to that of a more positive one. Try complimenting your partner more, and expressing your gratitude for the little things they do for you. Try apologizing for something you did. Try to give understanding where once you gave disagreement or disapproval. When you disagree, do so with a smile on your face, respecting the person and their position. 

You see, you can create a little happiness right now by basking in the power of now, and doing random acts of kindness or paying attention to someone who usually gets snubbed or ignored. You can find the beauty in the eyes you've taken for granted for so long. You can, in fact, make a new decision and change the way you've been reacting to a difficult situation. 

Try viewing yourself as your partner sees you. Try walking in their shoes. You could start making the relationship more about your partner and less about yourself. Be flexible. Do things their way, instead of getting your way.  

Truth is, you can do almost a million things to improve any relationship right now. Want a better relationship with your son or daughter? Easy. Just spend some time with them, really listen without criticism and have some fun together.

Few kids ever feel totally understood by their parents, so dedicate yourself to achieving a fuller understanding of your child.

How to Enhance Any Relationship

What's the best way to improve any old relationship? When each partner is working hard to improve themselves, and are not pointing their fingers at each other, blaming or criticizing, the relationship always grows. So, you could take a few seconds to make an action plan for self-improvement.

Ask how could I change my thoughts and behaviors to be a better relationship partner? I can become more understanding, less judgmental and more forgiving. If I talk a lot, then I can simply listen more. Nothing could make my friend feel better than more listening on my part! 

Want to be a better friend? Easy as 1, 2, 3.

1. Jot down a kind note thanking someone for helping you in some way.

2. Notice the gestures of good will that your friend makes toward you and reciprocate them.

3. Focus on giving more. You could offer to help someone who is struggling. You could offer your support in some way, no strings attached. Just to make someone happy.

Good friends and relationship partners are selfless. They focus on the needs of others. They make peace in every moment.

young men talking in front of a computerListen, make good eye contact and show others you care.

Walk A Mile In Their Shoes

Yes, I can harness the hidden power in the present moment to walk in my friend's shoes, or to try and see myself as my friend sees me. No one is perfect, so how could I become a better partner? Asking the question and being honest with yourself can make a world of difference in the actual relationship. 

Ask questions. Call your friend (using the power of now) and ask if they want to go bowling with you. If they say no, then ask what they want to do, and make a plan to do it. If they say yes, then take them bowling.

If you're a father who has been coaching his son on swinging a gold club, ask if the last coaching session was helpful, or what he would like for you to teach him next, or what he'd like for you to do differently. Don't get upset, if he gives you criticism. Accept it and be strong enough to make the change he desires. 

"Don't push the river, it flows by itself.
Fritz Perls

  • If your son or daughter, spouse or employee tells you you're too intense (you come on too strong)
  • too dominating (you dominate every conversation)
  • too overwhelming (you lecture and intimidate or it has to be your way or the highway)
  • then listen carefully and learn that's how others see you. So, change it up. Thank them for their feedback and assure them you'll work hard at being a better relationship partner. Get busy. You have work to do!

Immediately get to work at taking it easy, backing off and letting the person you care about take control listening more, sitting back and enjoying the relationship more, refraining from telling them what to do. The key is putting the change to work now. Us the power of now to start the ball rolling.

Ask not what you can do tomorrow, but today.

The 75/25 Rule

Invoke the 75/25 rule, which means to practice listening 75% of the time, and talking 25%. You'll become more likable and desirable to everyone and you'll be more fun to be around. Instead of talking about yourself, ask them to open up and tell you more about themselves. Learn to enjoy listening and observing, and partaking in the fun more passively. You'll sense the power in the wisdom of discretion and you'll delight in watching your loved ones take the ball and run with it.

In Sum

Tom Peters said that good managers and leaders have a bias for action. If you want to make your dreams come true, become an action figure, who uses the present moment to full advantage, and take action toward your goal, however large or small, in the here-and-now. Nothing is more magical than the power of now. What can you do right now to make a change in your life?